the fear of being myself

today i went bowling with the fam
i totally suck at bowling
i mean im terrible
but when i was there the music was good as
it was like they had taken my old ipod and played it
it was awesome
and we were next to this asian family who were nice as
so i was sitting down waiting when miley cyrus's 'the climb' came on
and i was singing 'i can almost see it, that dreamim dreaming but there's a voice inside my head saying, youll never reach it' taya was singing too and then i looked to the asian family and one of the sons was singing too. so i started to laugh and smile because it was kinda funny that three of as sang at the same time and i was really proud of that kid because it was like brave for a guy to sing in public. like how many guys do that these days? in a weird way i was like proud. anyways this kid whos name started with s and for the sake of this blog i shall call him sam, but this sam i will remember forever and at least now i can read this if i forget. but i hope that more people can be themselves in public. you know that medibank add? thats like: whats freedom? freedom is sleeping in. freedom is dancing in public. <--- lets go dance in public, lets go be crazy and wear retro clothes and undies on our heads and peacock feathers sticking out of our pants and big guinness hats. yet we dont actually, we wear fashionable things and we dress up for down the road and even though i say it all the time i never go out in my pyjamas. why does our hair have to be done to go and have a coffee down the road? because we worry about what people think, we are worried about what people say about us. we are scared. shit man i am scared. but i dont want to be. i want to wear what i want and not have to be looked at strangely. i want to be myself and not care if people look at me weirdly. but im scared that ill never be able to do that. scared that im going to turn out to be that lady in the series of unfortunate events the eide window where that lady is scared of everything and anything. she ends up dying in the end and she has nothing. and her house is realy creepy too. she doesnt hold the door knob because shes scared itll fall and spray into her eyes and shes scared the fridge will fall on her. and she doesnt use the heater or oven because she doesnt want to get burnt. she was scared of everything, papercuts even and i dont want that to be me. i dont want to be scared but i am. fear is terribly annoying me right now.
niah xx


why not

You think you're going nowhere
when you're walking down the street
Acting like you just don't care
when life could be so sweet
So why you wanna be like that,
This is nothing new
You're not foolin no one
you're not even foolin you
So walk a little slower
and open up your eyes
sometimes its so hard to see
the good things pass you by
There may never be a sign
no flashing neon light
tellin you to make your move
or when the time is right (so)

why not (Why not)
take crazy chance
why not (Why not)
do a crazy dance
if you lose the moment
you might lose a lot
so why not why not

(why not take a crazy chance, why not take a crazy chance)

You always dress in yellow
when you wanna dress in gold
instead of listenin' to your heart
you do just what you're told
if you keep waiting where you are
oh what you'll never know
so let's just get into your car,
and go baby go! (so)

why not (Why not)
take crazy chance
why not (Why not)
do a crazy dance
if you lose the moment
you might lose a lot
so why not why not

Ohhhhh!I could be the one for you
Ohhh yeah! yes maybe no
Ohhh!! It could be the thing to do
all I'm sayin is you gotta let me know

Ah yaya yaya yayaya

You'll never get to heaven
or even to LA
if you don't beleive there's a way

(why not take a star from the sky
why not spread your wings and fly)

Oh! It might take a little
and it might take alot
But why not why not

why not
(take crazy chance)
take crazy chance
why not
(do a crazy dance)
do a crazy dance
if you lose the moment
you might lose a lot
so why not why not


coming clean

Let's go back
Back to the beginning
Back to when the earth, the sun, the stars all aligned

'Cause perfect didn't feel so perfect
Trying to fit a square into a circle
Was no life
I defy


Let the rain fall down
And wake my dreams
Let it wash away
My sanity
'Cause I wanna feel the thunder
I wanna scream
Let the rain fall down
I'm coming clean, I'm coming clean

I'm shedding
Shedding every color
Trying to find a pigment of truth
Beneath my skin

'Cause different
Doesn't feel so different
And going out is better
Then always staying in
Feel the wind

Let the rain fall down
And wake my dreams
Let it wash away
My sanity
'Cause I wanna feel the thunder
I wanna scream
Let the rain fall down
I'm coming clean, I'm coming clean

I'm coming clean
Let the rain fall
Let the rain fall
I'm coming...

Let the rain fall down
And wake my dreams
Let it wash away
My sanity
'Cause I wanna feel the thunder
I wanna scream
Let the rain fall down
I'm coming clean, I'm coming clean
Let the rain fall down
And wake my dreams
Let it wash away
My sanity
'Cause I wanna feel the thunder
I wanna scream
Let the rain fall down
I'm coming clean, I'm coming clean

Let's go back
Back to the beginning