ICE AGE 2 - the meltdown

ok last night i had a massive breakdown
everything i watched yesterday made me cry or made me mass sad
then when i went to bed i like well had a melt down
ask brandon, he was helping me.
i was going on about being a murderer and a killer
hold on ill re-write the texts
niah - Brandon? im scared
brandon - :O what are you scared about?!? Tell me!
niah - School Life Death Love Time Darkness Height Spiders Snakes Crying Sounds Difference Everything. I'm just so scared right now i'm so lost. noone can find me Bran
brandon - Babe im so sorry :S but you dont need to be scared. i'm here for you but im afraid thats all i can do right now coz im not so good with words. Why are you scared about it all?That might be a stupid question but it could be the only way i could help
niah - I'm such a waste of space, of air. The world is falling down around us and im making it worse. I'm a killer, im a murderer. im bad. wha do i do? help me
brandon - you're not a waste of space or air. if you were, do you think you would have friends that care so much about you? and how the hell are you a murderer? everyone lives for a purpose. were meant to enjoy life for as long as we can and not worry about whats gonna happen tomorrow. i think just dont think about things so deeply. sorry bad with words...
niah - you're great with words. you made me cry. bad words wouldnt make me cry. Every second an area the size of two soccer pitches gets logged abd im lying on a dead tree.i kill so many animals everyday gasses i make melt ice caps and flood homes and the poor little ants i step on. Babe tomorrow is everything xxxx
brandon - babe itll be hard to stop them from cutting down so many trees. So many people use all that stuff they dont need so its barely your fault. what makes you think about all of this? you make me worry when you worry. please dont worry. cheer up hunny youll live alot longer. i want you around for as long as i have to live.
niah - what makes you sure i wont die tomorrow? i dont want to die brandon. i dont like death. its mean and scary and too many things face it everyday too many animals and people.the world shouldnt be like this. the world should be healthy and a happy place but its not. you make me happy baby. you make me smile.
brandon - no you wont die tomorrow. god has a plan and a purpose for you. and death is just another way of continuing life. it goes on for a good amount of time and im pretty sure no one can change this. please smile babe. i dont know why youre worrying! and yes, life is to short to worry. so smile and enjoy it while i enjoy mine with you.

and it went on.
my question though is, is there something after death?
is there a heaven or a garden or an ocean or do you come back as something/someone else or is it a big black nothing. is death the end? or is it another chapter in your life? when your dead can you watch over alive loved ones? can you haunt people? my nan said she saw the light when she passed out once and that it was the most beautiful thing shed ever seen. so i believe there is a light but where does it lead? i wont find out but i have to ask. i dont want to go nowhere i want to live i want to live in death.
niah xx